Anastasia, who strongly preferred to be called Ana, was sitting stretched out over a chair in the Gryffindor Common Room a few feet from Ana, who was working on her homework in her favorite spot in the Common Room, a small two seater table right beside the fireplace. It had been her Godmum Hermione's favorite spot as well. It was warm and cozy and perfect for working on any bit of homework.

Ana, who was still lounged comfortably over her chair, looked up to see what Lily had finished. "Yay! will you check mine Lils?" Lily nodded and took the essay that Ana handed her. She pursed her lips and concentrated, picking up her quill she began to read the essay, crossing out a bit here and adding in something there. Both girls were smart, but Lily was the one who honestly did love school. She was just like her Grandmum in that respect. Her favorite class would be a tie between Defense Against the Dark Arts and Transfiguration. Defense was taught by Remus Lupin, one of her two most favorite members of her family (the other being Sirius). It had only been a few years ago that Sirius was found in the Department of Mysteries unconscious and remembering nothing. Since then Lily had formed a strong bond with him as she had with Remus. Remus, who had been persuaded by McGonagall to come back and teach in Lily's first year, had somehow broken the curse. Everyone came up with many ways that he could have done it, but Lily knew how.. he'd already given into it once, when he'd been teaching during Harry's school years and it had got out around the whole bloody school about his "furry little problem." Now it was common knowledge- at least to the students whose parents were taught by Remus and wished their children to know, that the professor was a werewolf, and usually, to make him comfortable, the subject was never brought up. Or possibly it might have been because the students knew that Lily was a whirling dervish with both the tickling hex and the bat bogey hex and was not afraid to use either one in Remus' defense if need be and that no matter where house loyalties lay, Ana would, like as not, help out.

Sirius, much to Minerva McGonagall's approval and Ginny's displeasure had been giving Lily lessons in the art of becoming an Animagus. Originally it had just been something for them to do to get to know each other a little bit during Lily's second year, but recently the lessons had become deadly serious when Lily had come this close to actually succeeding in making a complete transformation! Ana, Lily, and Sirius had thought it quite the most entertaining event of the year to sit at the kitchen table of Twelve Grimmauld Place and listen to Ginny Weasley Potter ranting and raving about the fact that "Really! Sirius!! how could you?! Lily's too young to be learning to transform! Next thing I know you'll be teaching her to hang out with you and Remus at full moon and dragging her off on Merlin knows what other trouble you get into!!" and of course Lily's grandmum Molly had reacted in the predictable fashion just as Ginny had- after all.. like mother like daughter. And Harry, in predictable father fashion had congratulated Lily on her success and then was quick to add, mostly so Ginny didn't get upset with him also, that it was a very naughty thing to do and threw in a wink. It was true, the war, Dumbledore's death, and the burden on his shoulders had changed Harry from a mere schoolboy to a man. But there was still a hint of that schoolboyish Harry whom Sirius had met years before buried deep down in there and Lily most enjoyed those times when he surfaced.

"Ah, there you go." Lily said with a grin as she handed Ana's checked and corrected transfiguration essay back to her.

"Thanks, Lils." Ana said happily, putting her paper away too.

"You're welcome, do we have next class together?" Lily asked with a little yawn as she got up from her seat at the desk and went to stretch out on the love seat beside Ana's chair.

"Uh uh... I have History of Magic and you have." Ana raised one eyebrow trying to remember the Gryffindor's schedule, being in opposite houses had definitely made Lily and Ana's friendship a difficult one. They had had their share of fights like any set of friends, but they were always miserable when they were apart and the adults at Hogwarts- even Professor Slughorn was forced to admit the girls really were kindred spirits. "You have Herbology." Ana finally remembered. It was lucky that the girls DID have a host of classes together and even when they didn't in 9 cases out of 10 the assignment and the lesson had been the very same. Together they took Transfiguration, Defense Against the Dark Arts, Potions, and Care of Magical Creatures, but they had Herbology, History of Magic, Charms and Divination at different times. Lily also enjoyed potions. She had inherited her Grandmum's aptitude for that. It really reminded her of muggle cooking, you know the type where you do everything by hand. It really was similar, you had to put in the right ingredients at the right times at the right temperatures in the right amounts and let it stew for just the right amount of time and cross your fingers that the end result was what you had in mind and sharing classes with Marco Malfoy- who'd had it sworn in for Lily since first year and to top it all off was Ana's half brother, always kept classes plenty interesting.

At the moment the girls were on their lunch hour before having their last two classes of the day. To add to all the excitement it was Quidditch practice that evening. At first Lily had worried about being on the Quidditch team when she ended up there first year. She'd faked sick, too afraid to disappoint everyone in the try outs, and someone else had been elected. During mid first game the Gryffindor seeker got his skull cracked with a bludger and Lily, with a little assurance from Remus had gone down and volunteered to play out the rest of the game, thus inheriting the position of seeker. Three years later her flying skills were more carefully honed then ever and she had never failed to catch Gryffindor the snitch, well, yet anyway. When Gryffindor was playing it was common for Ana to show up to the match bedecked as a Gryffindor in support of her best mate (which always made the Slytherins mad as a nest of hornets knocked from their tree).

Lily sighed, "It's nearly time to head downstairs." She pushed a vivid red curl out of her emerald green, just hint of blue, eyes and picked up her bookbag, swinging it more snugly over her shoulder as they prepared to leave the Gryffindor Common Room. More often than not they hung around Gryffindors rather than Slytherins because after the initial frustration of finding out their house member had befriended a Slytherin girl and finding out that girl was actually pretty nice the Gryffindors had warmed up to Ana. The Slytherins however had not warmed up to Lily, in fact they were just as awful as ever. It was not at all uncommon to see Ana in one of the Gryffindor Common Room chairs with her legs draped over one arm and Ana sitting opposite her at her little desk or else in the sofa on any given night of the week, and particularly so on weekends, talking and doing their homework together.

And it wasn't as if Ana was a sweet, prissy little girl type, living in a home with death eaters had made her grow up fast and see things she wished that she hadn't. Lily was the sweet part of the equation and she was nice to everyone. In fact, to get under her skin, Marco had recently begun calling her Pollyanna after Ana had made the mistake of telling him about the muggle movie that the girls had watched with Hermione. However, Ana was loyal and the more time she spent with Lily and her huge family- pretty much the entire Order of the Phoenix, now under Professor McGonagall's care, she learned that it was alright to allow yourself to love and to be loved in return.

Lily considered her transfiguration essay as she headed downstairs to Herbology. In transfiguration they were turning puffskeins into snowballs- which had proved to be a very very messy project, but it had got everyone into winter spirit. That seemed to be the theme because they were learning to graft self kissing mistletoe in Herbology.

It was raw and bitter cold when Lily stepped outside into the early December afternoon with the rest of the Gryffindor and Hufflepuff house class members on their way down to Greenhouse four and another session of mistletoe. In previous years the boys would have found it funny and laughable, now they made jokes behind the girl's backs about which ones they'd like to snog and which ones would be most fun to take to the Christmas ball coming up in a few weeks. The wind whipped Lily's Gryffindor scarf up in her face and it was hard to walk against. Despite the inclement weather there was not even a spot of snow anywhere on the Hogwarts grounds. How depressing! If it's going to be so blasted cold we could at least have some snow! thought Lily as she made her way down the steep slope.

"I reaallyyy hope you catch the snitch early tonight Lils!" said Gabriella Wood as she made her own way up from Herbology. Gabriella was a seventh year to Lily's fourth and they were Quidditch team mates and had been since Lily started in her first year. This was Gabriella's second season as Quidditch captain and the pressure on the Quidditch Cup was already mounting as it did every year. "I didn't know it would be this cold when I booked the pitch!"

"It's alright, I'll try and catch it in a hurry!" Lily called, the wind whipping away her words. When they arrived at the greenhouse they were very very glad for the warmth inside of it. Everything was deliciously rosy and nice smelling and cozy. Professor Sprout was happy to see them and quickly handed out gloves so that the partners picked last lesson could get to work on their mistletoe.

Lily's partner was Nathaniel Longbottom. The boy was as clumsy as his father had been before, but Lily could see a definite improvement in his magic since their first year. "That was good." She complimented on a nice bit of spell work he'd done on the mistletoe.

"Now, for Tuesday, I would like ten inches of parchment on the properties of both types of mistletoe and a comparison and a contract paragraph between the two types, I'll see you then, class dismissed." Professor sprout said, winding her muffler tighter around her mouth before opening the green house door just enough to let the students get out- and a blast of freezing cold air in. "My poor plants!" she remarked softly as the last student left the greenhouse and she shut the door quickly.

"I wish it wasn't History of Magic next." Lily said to herself. But something was about to happen in History class that would make Lily sit up and pay more attention than she ever had before. Of course she always took notes, but she was never really interested in what Professor Binns had to say as the only ghost professor of Hogwarts droned on and on and on in his monotone voice. Lily thought nothing short of an earthquake would stop him, perhaps not even that. Were ghosts sensitive to motion changes? She wondered as she hiked back up the hill, the strap of the book bag cutting uncomfortably into her shoulder and feeling as if she were carrying around a bag of rocks.

Lily met Ana coming out of The History of Magic classroom, and Ana was grinning fit to kill, "Would you mind telling me what?" Lily murmured to her best friend.

"You'll find out in there." Ana said, pointing to the History of Magic Classroom.

Lily raised a thin, red eyebrow but went on into the classroom. She would just have to contain her own curiosity- which would be most difficult- until she could find out what it was that had Ana so excited. She took her usual seat in the first row, after all, she had a reputation to live up to. She spread out her parchment and removed her quill, a feather from her own snowy owl Star Fire. She'd gotten Star Fire when she first came to Hogwarts as a going-to-school present from Remus, Ron, and Hermione.

She dipped into the ink well of black ink and wrote her name, the date, and the subject across the top of the parchment and then a hyphen after and the word notes. After this she set down the quill and rested her chin in her slim hand and looked around the classroom. This class they had with Ravenclaw house. She sighed and waited for Professor Binns to show up. The rest of the class had come in talking noisily and finally the chatter grew quiet and their Professor materialized from a painting on the side of the wall. He'd obviously been visiting.

"Good afternoon, class!" He said, but it was not in his usual monotone but a cheerful voice that Lily had never heard him use.

"What's up with him?" murmured one of the students who was sitting directly behind Lily. She merely shrugged and turned her attention back on Professor Binns thinking this was probably the strangest day in all History of Magic that she'd ever had.

"Now class, settle down, I have important news for you. We will not be taking notes today."

The class instead of settling down, increased their hubbub to a dull roar as books slammed shut and were put back into book bags and note paper and parchments were put away- Lily kept hers out just in case. "Class." said Professor Binns reproachfully because they weren't quieting down. It was quite some time before everyone was quiet in order that he might continue. "Now.. this year the ministry of magic in cooperation with Flourish and Blotts book and parchment store is hosting a very very special contest."

For once no conversations were going on behind the poor professor's back as each and every student turned to face the front. This type of thing was unprecedented at Hogwarts and they all knew it. "This contest is an essay contest and-.." The class, well mostly, groaned and very nearly went back to their own little conversations and note passing that ran through each and every single History of Magic class. "Now now class, you will want to work hard on your essays for the winner will not only be invited to the Ministry of Magic Christmas Ball to read their essay but they will receive house and class points from myself and a prize package from the ministry. The prize package includes 200 galleons, a writing set from Flourish and Blotts, and a brand new Firebolt."

The room broke into extremely excited chatter. The Firebolt, though having a few minor improvements was still the hands down best broom on the market and it had only gone up in value and price with the War going on Quidditch and other Wizard entertainments had gotten even more popular because everyone needed something to take their minds off the seriousness of the condition that their world was in at the moment. Lily's gasped softly. If she could get that broom she wouldn't need to buy a new one. At the beginning of the season Marco Malfoy had put Lily's own broom under the Whomping Willow. It had been smashed to bits and Lily had put off getting a new one. She'd been sad that she lost the broom her Dad got her. They'd gone to pick it out together and he'd let her try every broom in Quality Quidditch. At the time she'd been too scared of the Firebolt because she had never been on a really powerful broom before. For the one Quidditch game she had been in she'd used Remus' old silver arrow. Now though, after flying for four years she was ready for that Firebolt. She settled down into her chair more comfortably and dreamed about the prize package.

"Now," continued the Professor, "This will not be an easy contest, everyone first year through seventh year in this school will be competing it, so there will be over a thousand entries for this contest. You will want to work very very hard. Good entries will also be rewarded class points and/or house points by I and the other teachers." Finished Professor Binns, looking around.

"What's our topic, sir?" asked Lily.

"You must write a paper about a wizard or witch who made a difference." He said simply.

"A difference in what?" asked one of the Ravenclaw students.

"A difference in anything, in our world, in magic development, just as long as they made a difference." Replied the Professor. "And you will not want to put this off, the essay is due in one week, next Monday." Lily took a deep breath and nodded, she didn't even really know who she wanted to write about, but she was going to need to come up with someone quickly if she wanted to have time to write a really good essay. "Now since this essay is due so soon.. I'll be giving you today in class to work on it and do a little research.. get to work."

The class hummed with excitement as they moved to the old history text books and began to search for who they might want to write their report on. Lily however just sat and thought for some time.

That evening after a freezing cold Quidditch practice that not even Ana was daring enough to venture outside to see, the girls cuddled up with the rest of the Gryffindor Quidditch team just as close to the fireplace as they could. Professor McGonagall was doling out hot soup and drying charms for their robes and crossing her fingers rather heavily that no one would get sick.

"Soo.. what do you think of this contest?" asked Lily.

"Wouldn't it be really awesome to win it?!"

Lily nodded excitedly. "I'm going to try."

"Me too!" Little did the girls know they would be learning a lesson more important than winning a contest. They would, too, be learning the value of family and the difference that they make in your life..

~*~*~*~

By Friday afternoon Lily had almost completed her paper entirely. She was glad about that because even if Professor Binns had laid off the homework their other teachers had put it on ten times harder trying to get the last of their lessons plans in before end of first term which would be in just three weeks. The Annual ministry supper that the winner would be reading their essay at and be presented with their prizes was on Christmas Eve night. Lily was going to be spending Christmas Holidays at Grimmauld Place with Sirius, Remus, and the rest of the Order- excluding Minerva who would likely only be there Christmas Day because she would be needed at Hogwarts to help with the children that were staying there over Christmas even though there was only a handful of them. Grandmum Molly had also written in her most recent owl that she'd be fixing Christmas Eve midnight eggnog as well as Christmas Day supper at the burrow and everyone (including Ana if her parents would let her come, but Lily doubted) was most welcome to come over, which of course, who would turn down Molly's cooking?!

She grinned and added the closing statement to her paper and placed the parchments into her paper book. It really was parchments because Lily had written over twenty rolls and used a whole ink horn of ink on this paper, but she grinned happily feeling that it was one of the best pieces of work that she had ever done in all of her school life thus far. Then again, maybe she was a bit partial, having worked every evening on it that entire week.

Lily sighed happily and removed the cover page from her book again and began to copy the title of the report in her fine cursive hand writing. "Merlin: The Wizard and the Man" was the title of her report. She hoped that no one else had done Merlin. She'd heard a lot of whispers about Dumbledore, McGonagall herself, Nicholas Flamel, the four founders of Hogwarts and so on, but she hadn't heard anyone say anything about Merlin. Well, yet anyway. She finished the lettering and decorated around it in Gold and Red glitter ink, blowing it dry gently and lovingly. It was finished.

Ana, for once, wasn't tagging at Lily's heels. She had been loathe to admit it but she'd actually gotten a crush on a Slytherin boy. Lily smiled softly thinking about her best friend. She didn't mind that Ana liked someone, especially because Ryan Cleary had always been nice to her. He had transferred to Hogwarts from Durmstrang in their second year when his parents decided possibly Durmstrang wasn't the best place to send their son in light of the war and the curriculum the school taught. She had never seen him openly make fun of anyone and she was glad Ana had good sense to pick someone nice. In fact one of the times the Slytherins were being nasty he'd actually stuck up for them he'd said it was her and Ana's business if they wanted to be friends and no one else’s. That was when Ana had started liking him. Of course, like any Slytherin they could both be Quick fire and Lily feared the day they had their first argument. Particularly if she had to sort it all out! Both were competitive to a fault and to top it all off Ryan was a beater on the Slytherin Quidditch team. That was what really made Lily respect him, after their last match he'd come up and shook hands with her and said she played a good game. It was rare to find a Slytherin who had such good manners. Particularly when they were students. Ryan's suave manners reminded her a bit of Professor Slughorn and she laughed softly.

Lily was anxious to have someone read her paper after working so hard on it, but Ana was no where to be seen and Remus was the middle of a class. Decided Lily picked up her paper book and headed downstairs. She would see Professor McGonagall, she had a free space this hour of the afternoon just before supper, she'd be able to read Lily's paper. Lily got shivers up her spine at the prospect of someone reading (and possibly liking) her paper.

Unfortunately thing's didn't go as Lily planned right from the off. Minerva, good woman that she was, read each and every page of the report. It was factual, to the point, and even contained a few pictures that Lily had had to look high and low for to get her hands on.. but... there was just... something... missing. Minerva sighed and handed the papers back to Lily.

"Well?!"

"Well.... I think it was good.. as your work always is Lily, but... I.. I really think you could do better than this." replied the Transfiguration professor and headmistress putting one hand on Lily's shoulder. This had not been what Lily was expecting, praise and points possibly, but not merely, "Good.. but it could be better." She nodded, resignedly, sighed, and walked out of the classroom feeling as if someone had put a damper on her happiness.

To add to it all she'd just gotten her hands on a copy of the Daily Prophet, there had been a major battle between the Order Members and the Death Eaters in London the evening before. She'd gotten an owl from Sirius letting her know that everyone at home was ok- though Tonks was now sporting a brilliant dead ringer in one eye now compliments of a one Bellatrix Lestrange. Lily was relieved about that, but the war with Lord Voldemort and his Death Eaters was causing such tension and instability. Lily hadn't ever known anything different. She was born into it and she would be in it until either... "NO!" She murmured, quickly pushing the thought from her mind, but it nagged at the corner ever since she'd found out in her third year.. about the prophecy.. That war would go on until either Lord Voldemort or her father ended up dead. Tears pricked at the edges of Lily's eyes and she wished very very much Ana were there with her.

It was as if Lily's wish had been magically granted, for when she returned to the Gryffindor Common Room Ana was there waiting for her.

"Hey what's wrong Lils?" Ana asked, immediately sensing her friend's distress.

"Oh.. it's just this essay I suppose.. I asked Minerva to read it and um.. I don't think she liked it very much.. she said that it was good but that I could do better. And then I got all worried about the Daily Prophet and the real prophecy and.. I don't know." She murmured.

Ana conjured her best mate a Kleenex and put a reassuring hand on her shoulder. "It's going to be ok." Finally Ana gave up and hugged Lily against her. She'd never been much one for hugs and showy emotions, probably had to do with that she'd never gotten that herself, but she knew Lily needed some right now. And Lily was never far behind to return the favor should something upset Ana.

"Look I know what you can do to help.. why don't you ask Remus to read it, his last class should be almost up and maybe he'll be able to tell you how to fix it better than it is." Ana suggested. Her pale, pointed face was filled with concern for her friend. She stood up with her, one arm still around Lily's waist. The two were a motley crew as always One tall, white blonde haired Slytherin with a pale, hard pointed face and blue grey eyes that had just learned to smile and a small for her age, short, red curly haired, emerald eyed Gryffindor that had been smiling and bringing comfort to the world from the moment that she was born and put into her father's arms and he said softly, "I want to name her Lily, Gin..." And her mother had said, "Lily it is."

Lily gave Ana a big hug, "Thanks, you're the best." She murmured before picking up the essay and heading downstairs to see Remus, really hoping he'd have something better to say about her report.

"Hi there Lily." Remus said happily, glad to see his favorite girl. "What's the matter?" He asked, seeing the crestfallen look on her face.

"I can't seem to get my essay right." She said.

"Let's see." Remus said, holding out his hand for the papers. Lily handed them to him and then ran closer cuddling close to his chest. Hard tears ran down her cheeks, but she didn't let him see them. It wasn't even so much the essay but just all the stress of end of term and everything going on in her life culminating in the fact that any of the people that she loved might die in a war that wasn't really even hers yet before she ever got to see them again. More and more often she'd been waking up shaking and sick with nightmares. It had all begun to take it's toll and she would be relieved when Christmas Holidays hurried up and got here. The two weeks off when be like Heaven for her and give her time to recharge.

Remus understood. He gently cuddled her into his arms as he read. He too was exhausted. Being back at school he spent most months on Wolfsbane potion, which was both a blessing and a curse. It allowed him to transform while keeping his mind and being sane. However it didn't stop him from the urge to rip himself to bits. It also worked on him like muggle chemotherapy. It seemed, still after so many years, to zap him of what remaining strength he did have. When Lily looked up she noticed that his face looked more tired and pale than ever. She pressed her face against his. "Looks like I won't be the only one ready for Christmas Holiday hm?" Lily asked, more happy now. "And then Tonks will be done serving her weeks shift at the Order so she can come back here to school with you and everything'll be ok again." Lily said.

"Indeed it will my Lily.. things will always be ok again.. and you know you can always come to me and Sirius with anything right?" He asked softly.

She nodded happily against his shoulder. "Thanks, Uncle Remus." She said, waiting on him to finish reading, which he did in the space of a few moments. To amuse herself she walked around examining the new creature in the back of the tank that Remus had "captured" for Defense Against the Dark Arts class. She couldn't tell what it was because there was a sheet over the cage. She took a little peak. Whatever it was in there didn't want to be disturbed because it sent a splash over water over the top.

"Remus, are you planning to bring a 'werewolf' to class later this year?" She teased.

"Yep... he's sitting in my chair, and wearing my clothes, and grading these dratted exams, hope he has better luck than me." Remus laughed too. That had been a little joke of theirs for as long as she could remember. Whenever he caught something new she'd ask if he'd bring a werewolf someday and he would always say yes. It was his subtle way of letting the world know that even though he was still rather ashamed and wished to be a normal person that he no longer felt the need to hide his secret so carefully- though Lily was sure it was not something he was yet ready to reveal to her class as an entirety, whether some of them knew anyway or not.

"What do you think Remus?" She asked with a little smile, as he handed her back the paper.

"Welll.... now this is just me mind you.. but if I was going to do this paper, I'd do it on someone who actually had an impact on my life.. that's what you're missing Lily, all the dry facts and numbers are here.. but you remember that time you tried to make cookies for Sirius when he was in the hospital.. and you didn't add in the milk and the dough wouldn't clump because there was no liquid?"

She nodded. "Well that's what's here. You need some bonding liquid, something to make it more personal. I'd write it on someone who actually made a difference not just to the wizarding world but to me as well.. like.. Dumbledore. He gave me a chance when no one else was willing. He was like a grandfather to me." Remus said with a little smile of fond remembrance of the headmaster.

Lily nodded, beginning to understand. "I never met Dumbledore though... well.. just his portrait." It was true, Professor McGonagall had brought Lily to meet with Dumbledore on a number of times regarding dreams she'd had. Like her father she tended to have dreams that weren't always dreams, though there had never been such a severe incident as the one early one when Harry had had Voldemort in him for a brief period when Lily's grandfather Arthur was attacked- little things had happened. Occasionally Lily just went to see him because. But that was a little different than actually meeting someone.

"That doesn't matter, pick someone special to you, you don't have to meet them, just as long as you can tell us why you think they had an impact on you along with the whole rest of the world." Remus told her.

Lily nodded, "I think I can do that."

"There's my good girl." he responded, giving her a hug. "I'd ask you to stay for tea, but it's nearly supper now.. so I don't want to ruin your appetite. See you at supper?"

Lily nodded, "I'll see you then.. I'd be scoot, Ana's going to be wondering what happened to me."

Remus nodded with a smile and returned to his desk puzzling over Lily's essay. He well remember how she had changed. They had always been together. He had actually been there when she was born. He, Molly, Minerva, Harry, Hermione and Tonks. He and Harry had spent a good deal of time pacing the floor and being greatly nervous until the women dismissed them into the hall, promising to call them back in time. After that they'd paced on a grander scale, the halls of St. Mungo's.

"You know.. I rather prefer being the visitor." Remus had teased and Harry nodded with a laugh.

When they went into the room Ginny had handed the baby- who wasn't crying but looking calmly around at the sea of faces now surrounding her- over to Ron who quickly handed her to Remus. Lily's tiny fingers had wrapped around one of his and he'd been sold just like that hook, sinker, line and barrel. Remus quickly pulled himself out of his daydreams and tried to focus his mind back on his work.

Later, Lily sat at one of the tables in Hogwarts Magnificent library gently thumbing through an old magical volume of wizards and witches of modern day. She was considerably hyped up on the report for having just torn up her old twenty page copy and dug in to write the whole thing over and it being due on Monday, just three days, and all, but Lily felt it would be worth it. Remus had given her a new fervor to succeed with this essay, more so than ever.

"Who should I do?" She murmured softly. First Remus himself had gone through her mind. But there were too many things wrong in that sentence. There were something’s just meant to be kept quiet and this was one of those, for everyone involved.

Suddenly her mind hit on a brand new idea, one she had never thought of before, but now thinking of it, it seemed absolutely perfect. There was a wizard out there who had changed the world, put it on it's guard for an entire school year as he ran amok doing his best to take revenge on the man who had framed him and to meet his god-son whom he had not seen since before the boy's first birthday. This same wizard had changed Lily so very much in the past few years. Sirius. He was loyal to his friends, even to the death, as he'd been heard to have said. Lily smiled happily, picked up her quill and pulled out a fresh sheet of parchment, careful not to drip any ink on it.

~*~*~*~

"Ugggh!"

"Still nothing?" asked Ana softly, laying a pale white hand on Lily's shoulder.

"Nope." She pulled loose one of the Daily Prophet strips from the wizarding microfiche machine. It was different than muggle ones because it would actually search the papers for you itself and more than one at the same time also. She had been searching everything Azkaban or Sirius Black for the last three hours and hadn't found what she wanted, and that included using the cloak to sneak into the restricted section after Madam Pince had gone to bed.

"Look.. here, here, and here." Lily gestured to the papers spread around the best mates at the table and fanning out in huge stacks all over the floor, "There's tons about supposed sightings on the run, about him being insane, about the murders.. but there isn't one single thing about Azkaban besides mention of "The Dreaded Wizard Prison." Lily murmured quietly but fiercely so as not to wake up the librarian. The cloak had become a tent by this point, stretched over two chairs with the girls, the machine, the papers, and a lantern all hidden carefully beneath it. It faintly reminded Lily of when she used to build tents with ordinary blankets in the middle of the Burrow's kitchen and her Grandma Molly would cook right around them and sometimes even come inside to join her granddaughter for a spot of tea.

"No one wants to talk about Azkaban.. the ones that have been in there.. by the time they get out they're too crazy to say anything... has Sirius ever even told you how he got out or anything? Or for that matter how he kept from going crazy?"

Lily shook her head, "No.. I think he and Dad might've talked about it, but never to me." She shifted another newspaper. "I only really know the barest of facts.. I don't think Sirius really likes to talk about those times. He was Grandmum and Granddad's secret keeper but then he and this other man, Peter Pettigrew, they switched and Peter went and betrayed them to Voldemort. Sirius didn't tell anyone he'd switched so the ministry was after him and he was after Peter and there was a great big incident in the middle of a main street.. look.. this paper even calls it 'The Main Street Incident'. And they all thought Pettigrew got killed but he transformed into his animagus form, a rat, and ran off framing Sirius for all of it. Later Sirius broke out because he saw the rat's picture in the Daily Prophet...but everybody thought he was after Dad."

"Wow.. but that's not really enough detail to go on about how he changed the whole wizarding world.. and besides.. if you're going to write a report, you'd need a little biography in the beginning.. you know like.. Sirius was born at such and such and place at such and such a time." Ana said, pensively pushing a cornsilk strand of her hair behind her ear. "Do you know any of that?"

"Hardly any.. just that he really really hated his family and they were all Slytherin, but he didn't believe in what they did."

Ana's heart thudded hard against her chest. "Did you just say?" Very slowly she looked up at Lily, her eyes wide. Had Sirius had the same struggle she was having now? The struggle to choose between two destinies? To choose between her best friend and the family who'd accepted her or her real biological family who kept pushing her each day to declare her loyalty to the Dark Lord. Did he know, too, what that felt like?

"What's the matter?" asked Lily with a raised eyebrow, noting Ana's concerned expression.

"Nothing.. just thinking." She said. Lily wasn't convinced, but she didn't press. It wasn't Ana's way to spill out her heart until she was good and ready and Lily would wait patiently for her until she was ready to do that.

Lily yawned and looked over at the clock, "Ana..it's almost four a.m." She murmured with a long sigh.

"I know.. and we still haven't found anything we really need and/or that we don't already know. Remind me to find some duct tape the next time I go to visit Remus.."

Lily laughed softly. "Yes, it was a brilliant plan.. just the...executing of it is not working out as easily as I'd planned and I don't even want to think about the fact that this is due Monday morning and I don't even have an opening paragraph written!"

Ana nodded with a little sigh. "Your other one took you all week to finish and that was when you were working on it every spare second including writing on it while you were taking class notes in Transfiguration- yes I saw you."

Lily smiled, "It would be kinda hard for you not to considering we were sitting at the same table." In classes they had together Lily and Ana worked as a foursome with two of the girls in Lily's dormitory, twins, Agatha and Agnes. The girls were twins and they both had honey brown hair which curled in wild ringlets to their shoulders exactly like a Gryffindor Lion. Lily had often said she wouldn't mind one of them switching hair with her for a couple of days, but deep down inside she knew she'd never really give up her red curls. Agatha and Agnes were little daredevils and they didn't really care what others thought of them. They enjoyed laughter and fun and work a little less, but even so they were bright and the girls usually scored high points if not all O's and E's on their papers.

"You know what the only solution is don't you?" Ana asked finally, shutting the book down that she was holding and setting it over in the floor.

"What?"

"You're going to have to ask Sirius."

Lily grew very quiet, "Say that again? Cause um.. I must've had some earwax.. I thought I just heard you say I should talk to Sirius!?"

"You're going to have to ask Sirius." Repeated Ana with a roll of her blueish gray eyes.

Lily exhaled with a sigh, letting her bangs fly up off her forehead. "I thought you said that."

"What's the matter? I thought it was a good suggestion."

"Ana, you know Sirius..didn't you see him that night last year.." She murmured softly. "I can't do that to him. I can't ask him to relive that for me."

"I saw.. said Ana softly." It had been the beginning of their third year when the girls had managed to score themselves a detention for fighting with Marco and his "girlfriend" Priscilla Parkinson, who were being particularly evil to Ana. Lily had gotten the better of him setting a bat bogey hex on him leaving him to go to the hospital wing. Luckily they'd been able to serve their detention with Remus and Tonks. They had spent it cleaning up the classroom, which had been rather fun. He'd put music on the phonograph and scooted back all the chairs and let them use the old feather dusters and they'd all run amok having the time of their lives and later gotten into a pillow fight. Each time they got low he'd only magicked more pillows into the room until they were up to their knees in feathers. There was a boggart in his wardrobe that night and they'd convinced him to give them a crack at it. Sirius had come to visit and had joined in the pillow fight. He'd been last to face the boggart, which of course turned into a dementor, and it had been an unprecedented disaster. By the end of it he'd been on the floor huddled in a tiny ball sobbing and covering his head. They'd all been frozen, watching his terror as the boggart-dementor trembled over him before Remus had broken the spell and shouted "Ridikulus!" the boggart had burst into smoke fragments, leaving Sirius at his worst and rawest on the floor. It had been horrible and frightening and Lily couldn't imagine asking him to talk about it.

"Lily.. just ask..seeing a dementor.. or what you think is a dementor is a little different than simply talking about your past."

Lily sighed. "You're right.. and if I don't talk to him.. I probably won't be able to finish my report." She said with a soft little sigh. "Minerva's going to headquarters tomorrow. I heard her telling Remus the other day, with any good luck she'll take me with her."

"Good idea, for now.. if you want to go interviewing, you better get some sleep.. it's four a.m." Ana advised.

Lily nodded and hugged her friend. "Come back to the dormitory with me so you don't risk getting caught." She said, standing up and putting her books away. Ana nodded and picked up the lantern and the two invisible girls crept up the stairs and crawled sleepily into Lily's four poster.

~*~*~*~

It was several hours later, almost noon, when Lily awoke. It was the bright high noon sun that had awoken her. When it got that time of the day the sun shone unbearably brightly into Gryffindor tower. It was the type of sunny day that morning where the sun is so bright it looks like you could go out wearing your bathing suit, but when you look down there's snow all over the ground. Lily sprung from the bed and dashed to the window seat, yes.. it was true! There was snow- a LOT of it and it was piled in huge drifts and sparkling like the sweetest of homespun cotton candy or sugar quills ever there was.

It made Lily yearn to throw on her heavy robes and run out to play in it. It was a perfect blanket of whiteness. She often compared snow to a thick white blanket all fluffy and lacy that's just come out of a clothes dryer like the one Hermione had at her house and it deliciously warm when being wrapped around your shoulders after you've had a bath in the middle of winter. But then later after people had been in the snow and mucked it all up it's like someone walked right in and stepped all over the nice white blanket in their muddy boots.

But more than playing in the snow she needed to go to Grimmauld Place. This was her last chance to talk to Sirius. Even talking to him now would only leave her a single day for writing a paper which had taken her four days to write. This was going to take some sort of a miracle to pull off. She grinned at Ana still fast asleep in her bed and looking like an angel with her cornsilk hair spilling over the white sheets. Lily laughed softly, Ana might look like an angel, for that matter Lily herself might look like one, but there the real similarities ended!

She lifted the lid of her trunk and pulled out a red and white checkered knee length skirt and a white cashmere sweater as well as her regular lessons cloak with her Gryffindor patch on it out and got dressed quickly. She picked up her silver plaited brush and began to brush out her long red curls. She gathered them back in a thick ribbon of emerald green. It didn't match her skirt, but it looked nice next her hair. After this Lily stuck her wand in her robe pocket. Fifteen inches made of mahogany, swishy, and containing a unicorn hair. Mr. Ollivander had said it was because she was pure of heart. Lily hadn't really understood that then and now that she was beginning too she felt like it was an awfully big title for someone as small as her to live up to. Lily really was small. She was the smallest Gryffindor fourth year. In fact she looked like she'd fit in with the first years just fine. It was only her face that gave it away she was much older. Unlike some short people being short was becoming to Lily. She was also fined boned and thin. Basically put she was just little. Small for her age, perfect seeker build- she like that last one best, however you want to put it little. Remus kept assuring that like her father had she'd grow up someday, but she could hardly wait for that to happen!

Lily finished getting ready and headed downstairs to see Professor McGonagall. "Professor?" She asked, tapping on the door.

"Oh..Miss Potter.. come in." the Headmistress invited, sitting down at her desk and stopping her work on her papers for a bit to see what Lily needed.

"Professor.. I've decided to rewrite my essay."

Minerva raised an eyebrow, "Isn't it a little late for that now?"

Lily nodded, "I was up all night last night researching for it. I want this to be a good paper."

"Well..."

"Well, I need to ask Sirius a few questions.. so um.. I was wondering if you were going to Headquarters today." Lily said.

"No.. I wasn't planning on it." Lily's face fell and Minerva picked up on it right away, feeling a bit guilty. "But I don't see that as a reason you shouldn't be able too."

Lily looked up her face slowly breaking into a huge smile. "Thank you!" She said, hugging Professor McGonagall happily. The woman smiled down and gently hugged Lily back. She wondered how it was that they had all been blessed with this girl. A whiz at almost any subject, an excellent flier, and a quiet well behaved students that seemed almost too good to be true, oh yes, Minerva knew better than anyone Lily stumbled. She was shy- getting better, and oftentimes her self confidence wasn't the best in the world. But her true gift was her love. She could enter a room and absolutely fill it brimming full with happiness, cheerfulness, and love for the people in it, and Minerva knew that Hogwarts was a better place because of that. If only they could all be more obvious at showing the deepest feelings of their hearts without worrying about having them ripped out and stamped on! Plainly speaking, Minerva felt as if this sweet little girl was the granddaughter she'd never had and she couldn't disappoint her.

"You're welcome, I'll let you floo using my fireplace, just don't mention it to anyone."

Lily nodded and walked to the fireplace, taking a handful of creamy, sandy floo powder and stepping into the embers on the grate. She flung it down. "Twelve Grimmauld Place!" She exclaimed and bright green flames sprung up around her and both Lily and them were gone in an instant.

Lily tucked her elbows in so she didn't hit them as she swirled through fireplaces going faster and spinning so quickly she couldn't really get a proper look into any of the houses that passed her as she finally landed with a "Ummph!!" in the kitchen fireplace of Twelve Grimmauld Place. She stood up a bit shaky legged and brushed the ashes out of her cloak.

"Hello?" She heard Sirius call and heard the tap of his shoes on the floor as he appeared again the kitchen. At first Sirius thought his eyes were deceiving him.. "Lily?!" She ran to him and Sirius hugged her tight, spinning her around in the air, making Lily giggle as he sat her down and put his arm around her shoulders. She took a good look at Sirius and he took a good look at her.

"You grew a foot." He teased, even though it might have been half an inch.

"And you cut your hair!!!" She exclaimed. The last accusation was true.. sort of.

"I didn't do anything!" Sirius defended. "Molly cut my hair. She said it was getting to looking downright scraggly and I needed to look good for Christmas. I'm planning on trying to grow it back in my sleep." He said with a wink.

Lily laughed and cuddled close to Sirius. "It's still good looking." Lily really did think, next to her Dad, that Sirius was the best looking man she'd ever known. Even with shorter hair it still curled in elegant waves around his face, which had filled out quite a bit in the last few years. Thought Lily had never seen him as the gaunt, shrunken faced man who'd escaped from Azkaban in her father's third year she could imagine it. There was always that look in his eyes, the deadened Azkaban look he would never lose, the look that he'd seen life at the worst and lived to tell the tale, but there was a little bit of sparkle in there too, his old look from when he was pranking all Hogwarts with James, Remus, and Peter.

"Well I'm glad you think so.. personally I still want it grown out a bit." He said with a wink. "And what are you doing here? I wasn't expecting a surprise this good until Christmas." For he and Lily hadn't seen one another since Hermione, Ron, Harry, Ginny, Alastor, Kingsley, Molly, Arthur, Bill, Fleur, their daughter Belle who was five, and himself had ALL shown up to say goodbye to Lily in September three months before when she was leaving for her fourth year at school and he hadn't expected to see her until Christmas holidays began.

"Isn't it ok for a girl to come check on you?"

"Well if the girl's as pretty as my Lily." He said swinging her around again.

"Good!" She exclaimed, hugging him fiercely around the neck. She looked around Grimmauld Place. "Molly's been remolding again hasn't she?"

Sirius nodded, "Not that I mind." The place looked a lot different than it had before Sirius' supposed death. Molly and Lily had started remodling while he was in the hospital, not wanting him to have to come back to the place he'd been so sad in. All the house elf heads were gone, the carpets were new, the stains were washed from the wall, the old dark objects in the cellar were long gone- along with quite a few cobwebs and bats as well. But Molly just seemingly never had been able to stop remodling the place until the only bit of it left over was the portrait of Walburga Black and the old Family Tree Tapestry, both of which had been put on the wall with a permanent sticking charm. Lily had sworn to get rid of them, she just hadn't decided how she would go about it yet.

They talked about all manner of things.. school, the Order and the War (Sirius would always give her more information than anyone else would and he would tell the truth as well instead of trying to protect her.. didn't they realize she was fourteen bloody years old?!)

"Come on.. let's go out and sit in the porch swing.. I've put a new charm on the porch to make it warm in there, kinda like a greenhouse, and I want to see if it worked. We can have our tea out there." Sirius suggested.

"That sounds good." Lily said, her hands shaky and clammy when she thought about what having tea meant. She had to ask him soon or she was going to lose her nerve entirely and she couldn't afford to lose her nerve entirely!

The charm had indeed worked and the porch, to Sirius and Lily's delight, was perfectly warm. The snow had stopped and the sky was bright like bluebells and the sun was still rather bright. Sirius sat down on the porch swing and conjured a tea tray to set on the little table in front of them. Lily cuddled up on the swing beside him, pulling her feet up into it and leaning against his shoulder. "Hey Sirius?" She asked tentatively.

"Hmm?" He asked, taking a sip of his extremely hot cup of tea.

"Would you um.. I mean.. do you think you could...could.. tell me.. about um.. Azkaban?"

Sirius was so shocked he did what only one who is taking a drink of a super hot liquid while being asked to recount a part of their past they're not at all proud of can do. Pour it right down the front of said persons own robe front and then bite ones own tongue, leap out of the porch swing and trip over ones own robes and start hopping around swearing ones head off because the liquid burns like bloody hell.

"Oh Merlin.. I'm sooo sorry Sirius!!" exclaimed Lily her face flushing bright red, "Forget I ever asked you that!" She ran to the kitchen to get some cold water for him to drink which he downed- panting, his mouth practically smoking from it, in a single gulp. "I'm sooo sorry." She said again, tearfully, watching him out of the corner of her eyes.

Sirius slowly made his way over to the porch swing again after cleaning himself up and sitting down beside Lily. "It's alright, you just .. surprised me a bit." He admitted and he gently pulled her over to sit in his lap and cuddled her close to him. "What have you down now, that you need to know about Azkaban?" asked Sirius. It impressed her that he was even able to say the word.

"Nothing.. yet." She responded.

"Well.. I suppose I should tell you something’s." He said softly, "But, Lily, this is a sad story, an awful story, a story I never told anyone but Remus before.. are you really positive you want to know it?"

Lily took a deep breath and she nodded. "Yes."

Sirius nodded and repoured the tea, now a bit cooler and he took a long contemplative sip, thinking about where he should begin. "You um.. want to know about me.. or Azkaban in general?"

"Both." Replied Lily, feeling as if she had just picked up a book to read that had all the answers to all of her questions in it.

"Ok.. well then.. guess I better tell it from a person view huh." She nodded and crawled happily up into his lap and rested her head against Sirius' chest. "Let's see...well.." He considered over what to say.

"Just start from the part about Grandmum and Granddad and Daddy." She suggested.

Sirius smiled softly, "Ok.. well.. let's see.. I'm not sure how it was the Dumbledore knew that they were in danger specifically, but he did.. see.. thing about Albus Dumbledore was, you never crossed nor questioned him, you just did what he said and things always came out alright in the end. He was probably really a genius of some sort, though he'd never have admitted to it, he was very kind and very understanding. And back then we had the original Order, a lot of people from it have died, but some of us are still the same. He decided the safest thing to do was to put them into hiding so they went into a little muggle village called Godric's Hollow."

Lily hated to interrupt, this was the first time she'd really heard this part of the story. She'd heard tons about her grandmother alive and how much Lily herself was like her namesake from Remus and Sirius and everyone else in the Order, even Dumbledore's portrait made remarks on it, but never before had she heard this part of the story. "Does it have anything to do with Godric Gryffindor?" She asked.

Sirius shrugged, "Some people think it had significance, but I don't know for sure. Anyways.. then Dumbledore got even more uneasy, now I have to admit, and I'm ashamed of it, most of us Order Members were tired of freezing our..." - he had said something unrepeatable.

"Sirius!"

"Sorry... off in that frigid October air keeping watch over Lily and James in Godric's Hollow someone was there 24/7 for weeks and weeks and not a little sign at all did we ever see of anything at all suspicious so you can guess we weren't too happy- or at least the ones of us who'd been doing the freezing unbeknownced to Lily and James of course, weren't too happy when Dumbledore said he (yet again) wanted to increase security over them. He suggested that we use a Secret Keeping charm called the Fidelius charm."

"Ooohh that's like.. um.. Fido.."

"Exactly.. it's Latin for faithful or friend." explained Sirius. "James, of course, decided that I should be his secret keeper.. now this charm is a very complex thing and it's not used too often, but it has to do with sealing secret information inside a person."

"Called a Secret Keeper."

"Exactly, and how'd you get to be so smart anyway." Lily shrugged with a grin. "Anyway..James told Dumbledore that he wanted me to be the Secret Keeper and Dumbledore was already leery about me doing it, I didn't understand why, it wasn't till later that I did. It's sort of like a binding ceremony with all the complex charm work. Throughout the week after it was performed I started thinking along the same lines Dumbledore was even though I didn't know it. Everybody knew I was their friend.. what if someone let Voldemort know and he used me to get to them.. suppose he caught me unawares with veritaserum or something. I went to see Lily and James midweek and I convinced them to bluff. I said we should change with Peter, being the... supposedly.. sweet innocent guy that he was no one would ever suspect us of picking him, and just to top the whole entire thing off we wouldn't tell anyone except us three, not Dumbledore or Remus or anything. That was where I made my big mistake. I got to thinking I knew best and could handle it." He looked down softly. "If I hadn't convinced them to bluff...they'd have been fine to this day and I have to live with that knowledge for the rest of my days.. even though I didn't mean too.. I as good as killed one of my best mates.. one of the guys who was like a brother to me."

"Sirius. Look at me." Lily raised his face up from where he was looking down and twiddling his fingers. Sirius hesitantly met her eyes. "It is NOT your fault.. you did something very very smart. It just kinda.. blew up in your face."

"Yeah, a blow up that resulted in the loss of two lives as well as the almost utter ruination of a third, very innocent life." It was obvious he was taking this harder than he'd ever admitted. "Sure I was innocent of plotting to kill them, but I sure wasn’t in other ways."

"Exactly you couldn't have known you made a decision that you thought was right at the time, how could you have known Peter would betray you guys?"

Sirius thought about it for a moment, "You're right Lily... I just.. it's hard to tell myself that." She nodded, understanding. "Anyways.. I switched with Peter and on Halloween night disaster struck.. from what I know or can tell, and believe me.. I looked all around the ruins of that house for footprints.. there was only one person that acted that night, alone."

"Lord Voldemort."

Sirius nodded. "Indeed. Now.. here's where it gets a bit tricky, the only thing we know is what your Dad remembers whenever he encounters a dementor, otherwise he can't remember it, who could be expected to being so small, apparently James told your Grandmum to go and take Harry and he would hold Voldemort off. Voldemort however killed James straight off." By this point Sirius' voice was shaking. "Then he went up to the nursery where your Grandmum was with Harry. He told her to step aside, but she was begging for mercy. She didn't have to die...but she was smart enough to know the ancient magic."

"Looks like at least one person paid attention in History of Magic Class." teased Lily softly and even Sirius laughed slightly.

"Yeah.. she did.. and it was because of that love that Harry was protected. Anyway... no one knew what'd happened to Voldemort when that curse rebounded on him lots of people thought he was dead, and Dumbledore knew within an instant. He dispatched Hagrid to come and get your Dad because he apparently knew Harry was still ok. That's where I came into play. I'd promised James- who was worried about him- I'd go check on Peter where he was hiding out. Well.. he wasn't there, of course, that's when I started to wonder and worry. I took my motorbike straight to Godric's Hollow."

Lily started laughing outright. "YOU had a motorbike?!"

"Indeed I did, hey.. you only live once! and well.. as Minerva said when I offered to take her on a ride 'yes and I'd prefer it to be a long time more Black.' Anyway. While I was there I found Hagrid, who'd come for your Dad. I wanted him to give Harry to me of course, being his god-father and all and.. honestly, right out? I was grieving.. really bad." Sirius said softly, "Feeling that sweet, innocent baby in my arms would have really helped. But Hagrid stuck by his orders that he was supposed to take Harry to Dumbledore at his Aunt and Uncle's house. Lily's remaining protection and blood ran in Petunia.. her sister. Well.. I was really sad by this point and I gave Hagrid the motorbike.. what more would I do with it? I knew that within hours the ministry would be after me, not knowing the truth and what proof had I to give them? Afraid, horribly saddened and shocked, and so angry with Peter I could have murdered him on spot- which I'll admit, I tried on more than one occasion.. so many emotions doesn't help a person. I couldn't bring myself to leave.. I..." He took a deep breath.

"Did you see them Sirius?"

He had turned his face away from her and when Lily turned his face back tears were unchecked down his cheeks and he could only nod, putting his face in his hands.

"Oh Sirius." She threw her arms around him and didn't let go. There were tears on her cheeks too.

Sirius hugged her tight against him. "Anyway. After leaving I went looking for Peter, now you must understand.. so many emotions they... they make a person act in ways they wouldn't necessarily."

"That's why you wanted to kill him?"

Sirius nodded, "Exactly. I wanted to make him pay for what he'd done. Since then I've learned, like Dumbledore said, there are things a lot worse than death. But I was young.. stupid.. so I went after him in the middle of some metropolitan area of downtown London.. I saw him.. he saw me.. he tried to turn tail and run.. but I was too quick for him, but before I could make a move he'd gotten his wand out behind his back and blew apart the street, turned back into his rat form, and raced down the storm gutter with every other bloody rat making their get aways from the scene. And I was left standing there, alone, looking even more guilty than ever. He'd even yelled out about my guilt for all to hear. Even though it wasn't me of course. Well.. there was this huge crater in the middle of the street, It cracked the sewer below so everything was getting preettyyy dratted messy, and twelve muggles were dead, others screaming. It was awful. You know that muggle ship that sank in 1912.. the Titanic? Well.. I always thought standing there watching this horror that it was just as bad...maybe worse."

"Sirius.. they say you... you...."

"Laughed?" She nodded. "I did."

"Why?! It was awful."

"It was... I think it was more...the whole irony of everything. How it had all turned around on me.. that and being so confused. I was so full of emotions I thought I was gonna bust.. break right in half.. internally combust, whatever. It was all I could do to hold it together.. better laugh than cry, what were they going to think if the one they thought was guilty was standing there crying? Nope.. Laughing was safer.. better.. wouldn't risk getting my heart ripped out and stamped on then, as if it hadn't already been anyway."

"Then what?" Lily prompted softly.

"Twenty members of the Magical Law Enforcement Squad came and took me off and of course I went with them.. I was fading.. what else could I do?" Lily cuddled close and kept holding onto him. "Azkaban was the most horrible place.. ohhh.. I can't tell you how beyond awful it was. It was on a little island waayy out in the North Sea, not to make the prisoners stay imprisoned but to protect other people from those dementors.. no need for walls and junk when everyone there is trapped in their own mind. As for Azkaban itself, physically, it was a tall fortress tower with long narrow corridors. Each corridor contained ten cells. I actually was sort of lucky, not that you need to repeat that, but most of the cells had twelve or thirteen prisoners each crammed into them in a little like fifteen by fifteen foot enclosure, crammed together like sardines. Disease ran rampant as bad emotions did. I was lucky simply because I was a 'highly classified and guarded prisoner' I got three dementors but I also got a cell to myself. Well I knew if I wanted to stay sane enough to ever make Peter pay or live out my duties as god-father I was going to have to find some way to fight them and I didn't have my wand.. the Ministry had it of course. I actually had a little bit of fun with my dear cousin Bellatrix at the beginning, before I lost all sense of Maraudership. My cell was two down from hers so if we both sat in the edges we could see each other. I would sit there and hum the Hogwarts song or one of the Sorting Hat songs and she'd be throwing things around banging, telling me to shut the.. well.. something.. up. Basically my entertainment was driving her nuts. I know.. poor sport." Lily cuddled him close anyway. "And I found a way to fight off the dementors as well. They couldn't see and me being in my dog form protected me, they can't get to animal emotions so easily as human ones. They thought I was getting weaker.. like that old Hansel and Gretl story for muggle children where the witch had Hansel in a cage and she wanted to eat him and each day he offered her a chicken bone so she would still think he was too thin for eating."

Lily laughed softly. "You were both smart, both Hansel and You."

"Yeah.. we were.. when you're in Azkaban you learn to survive real quick. It's not a place you make mistakes in. I got prison numbers tattooed on my arm because I wasn't a person.. I was a number. A-6155843." He said softly before lifting up his sleeve. Tears slipped down Lily's cheeks as she saw the prison numbers tattooed into Sirius' skin, physical scars of something he didn't do. If they were that bad what were the emotional scars that he'd been carrying so many years?

"Why didn't you escape before?"

"What would be the point? I had no clue where Peter was, Harry was with his horrid relatives.. what would my life be? Running and hiding? Here I was safe.. miserable.. but safe.. without the ministry's consent they couldn't harm me. One night I saw a particularly horrifying sight. A man in the cell next to me that I'd started to become friends with.. he was.. was.. ripped from his cell.. given the kiss right there on spot in front of me. I hid in my bedroll with my head covered trying not to hear the way he shrieked in agony tried to fight and then the utter silence that lasted. Our conditions weren't even sanitary. We didn't have loos, just cans in our cell and often times they didn't get changed for days. There were cracks in the stone where snow and cold got in at winter and flies and unbearable heat in summer and we never got enough to eat. I watched two men fight to the death over a bread crust.. one.. miserable.. crust.." He said softly.

"Wow." murmured Lily.

"Yeah.. Wow's right.. One day Fudge came there and I asked him when he passed by my cell if he was done with his Daily Prophet.. I missed doing the crosswords.. really I just wanted something to read, to let myself what was going on in the world.. anything anything at all would do. Well to my surprise he gave it to me and ran for it.. I'm guessing he got creeped out that I was sane enough to speak to him. Well I saw this picture of your Uncle Ron and his family on the cover they'd won some money in a raffle and had gone to Egypt. Then it happened. I saw Peter.. in his rat form.. sitting on Ron's shoulder and it all fell in place. He'd found himself a nice family to cuddle down with and wait till Voldemort came back to power while I was left to rot like scum for his crime. All that hatred I had for him came back full force. I even started having nightmares about him."

"So you broke out?"

Sirius nodded, "Yep. I turned into my dog form, waited for them to open my cell to give me food and the ran for it. With my emotions being less distinct I was able to swim to the mainland without being captured. I decided I wanted one look at my god-son.. you know.. incase I did get captured. I knew I'd get the kiss then, and I wanted to be able to see him. So I went out of the way to Surrey, spied on him in a park. He was good and mad about something.. later I found out a relative of his had been over to the house insulting his parents.. he'd got so upset he blew this lady up like a big balloon and then he'd run away. That's when I got to see him.. but for a man just sprung from Azkaban a week before.. ohh that was a precious sight.. it was like seeing my James all over again in a third year's body. And you... the first time I saw you?" Sirius said running a gentle hand through her hair.

"Yes?" She asked eagerly.

"I honestly thought you were Lily...come to get me to go back to Heaven with her." He said softly, running a hand through her hair. And Suddenly she was hanging onto him extremely tight, tears cascading down both of their faces. I'll warrant Remus' told you about the Shrieking Shack and what took place there was well as my attempts to break in to get at Peter?"

Lily nodded. "And everything else after that. Thank you Sirius.. thank you!" And she flung her arms about him, putting her face in his shoulder. He felt the heaves of her back as she cried in deep emotion and he felt, for the first time, tears coming down his face. He had never really really honestly let himself cry about any of it, and suddenly he felt the walls around his heart break as the tears came hard and fast, rushing hot down his face and threatening to drown him, all the horrid memories tumbling around in his head and being emptied out like the last remnants of a cookie not wanting to come out of the jar when its being shaken.

The next thing Sirius knew it was some time later as the sun was sinking down below the horizon and Lily was cradling him against her, his face up against her chest, running her gentle fingers through his wavy hair and she was humming softly some soothing song or another as he let the tears come more. All of the ones he'd been saving back, never able to let show until now. And finally when he judged it safe for him to talk again. "Thank you Lily..."

"Thank you Sirius." She murmured and they hugged extra especially tight as he carried her upstairs and put her in his own bed instead of hers before changing into pajamas and coming in to cuddle her up close.

"I figured after the horror stories you might like to sleep in here with me." He said, brushing her vivid red curls from the sweet fourteen year old face. It held so much love and innocence. Lily only nodded gratefully. She hadn't even had to ask. He'd known she was scared to sleep by herself after that horrible story and he'd taken care of her. Lily cuddled up against him and was asleep almost instantly. For Sirius it took awhile longer to get his thoughts calmed and sorted before he too could fall asleep.

~*~*~*~

"Please put your quills down now, time is up." Professor Binns flicked his ghostly wand and all the worksheet papers left the students' desks and came floating up to his hands. "Now.. as this is our last class before Christmas holidays begin and our last class of term, we have a few things to discuss." The students looked around at each other. It was only 8 days until Christmas and none of them really felt up to listening while Professor Binns gave another lecture or even pretending to listen while really cleverly concealing other assorted amusements in their laps and beneath their desks.

"Now class.. do please pay attention for this concerns the Ministry, Flourish and Blotts writing contest!" and suddenly the mood of the class changed as the volume rose a pitch and died to a dull whisper as Professor Binns quieted them so that he wouldn't have to talk over the extreme racket they were making when they found out this had to do with their contests.

"Did someone from our class win?!" asked a little ravenclaw girl in tortoiseshell glasses.

Professor Binns just smiled amicably and waited for quiet. "The winner will be announced by Headmistress McGonagall at supper in the Great Hall. What this is about is your own individual House points and classroom grades from me. Now when I call your name, please come down to my desk and I'll show you the class grade and I'll announce how many points you have earned your house. Now remember, house points don't necessarily mean anything of value, this was only our own personal feelings as teachers what each of you should get. Everyone that turned in the essay automatically got ten points for their house and-.."

A huge cheer went through the classroom as it had every hour previously all the way through the day. "Now class.. quiet quiet! please be quiet!" exclaimed the professor, beside himself. Never but in the past month had such excitement gathered anywhere near his little classroom! "Cox, Levi." The boy stood up and strode down the rows of desks to Professor Binns desk. He obviously didn't like what he'd seen and winced when the teacher announced no extra house points after the original ten. As they soon came to find out extra house points was a rare treat and usually only the especially good essays were getting them. Lily wondered anxiously if Ana had gotten a fair grade on her own essay. Lily had read it over and thought it really had been brilliant. Ana had ended up doing Salazar Slytherin and what made hers stand out was that she had delved quite a bit not only into his beliefs about blood purity but the good contributions that he had made to Hogwarts and that he and Godric Gryffindor had been best friends, in the end suggesting maybe modern students should take a leaf out of their book.

"Potter, Lily." broke into her thoughts as she stood up nervously and went down to retrieve her score, which was an O. "Marvelous work my dear.. I must confess.. after that essay I was totally convinced of his innocence, however did you manage to get so much information? Ah well- thirty house points." a huge cheer went up from the Gryffindor half of the classroom and Lily just smiled, it would forever be her secret how she had gotten so much information. Though the ministry was no longer after him Sirius had never formally been declared guilt free and she had decided that was her summertime project and possibly even an Order of the Merlin first class as well if she could manage it. The Order to stop hunting Sirius had come when he'd been with Harry and Lily the first time in Diagon Alley and they'd actually had to fend off three huge surly looking wizards by wand point. When Sirius had held up his own wand they'd fled, screaming for their lives and for the fun of it Harry had added a bit of parseltongue. Lily was willing to bet those three ran all the way back to their houses. And she knew for a fact that she and Sirius had had many good laughs about it later. Served them right too!

After class Ana and Lily met up in the Gryffindor Common Room. Ana was waiting impatiently for Lily in her usual chair. "How in the world did you get the password?" Lily asked with a laugh. Even when Ana heard Lily give the fat lady the password, just to be impossible the woman usually changed it directly after she let them in.

"I was persuasive."

"Uh oh...."

"I threatened to drop a dungbomb if she didn't cooperate."

Lily laughed, "Nice." and sat down in the chair opposite Ana, "So what's up?"

"Professor Binns says they're announcing the contest winners tonight, I just wonder who it'll be.. and also I needed to tell you to watch out for Marco..he's got it out for you again. They've come up with a new nickname."

"What is it?" Lily asked softly, feeling her face fall a bit. But before Ana could answer there was a HUGE commotion in the Entrance Hall downstairs that the girls could hear clearly seven floors up.

"Oh bugger.. what do you suppose?" Ana murmured.

"I don't know." Lily went upstairs and retrieved the Marauders map from her trunk and tapped it gently with her wand. "I solemnly swear that I am up to no good." she said. The map began to appear on the old parchment and spread out like little spider webs as Lily gently unfolded it. Downstairs in the entrance hall were the names of many students as well as most of the teachers including McGonagall and the other heads of house Flitwick, Sprout, and Slughorn and... the Minister of Magic. In his twenty some years serving Rufus Scrimgeour had become a more.. decent.. person to deal with. He wasn't exactly anyone's best mate but he was more experienced, tended to listen and be more fair, and much to Minerva McGonagall's pleasure left her and her school alone. He'd also gotten Lucius Malfoy off the board of directors in exchange for Draco. Lily sometimes wondered which was the lesser of two evils. Of course Ana's father being on the school board did have a few advantages, but they tended to be few and far between most of the spoils were on Marco.

"We'd better get down there and see what disaster's happening now." Ana suggested as she tapped the map and wiped it clean, "Mischief Managed." And the girls headed downstairs together.

The Entrance Hall was at best, a crowded throng of shouting people and at worst a zoo where all the animals were let out of their cages. And suddenly there came a loud voice over and the rest through a magical megaphone. "QUIET!!!!" It was Minerva McGonagall standing on the first floor landing. "Now.." She said as the students quieted. It was obvious they'd been pestering the minister about his and the committee’s decision on the winning essay contest as the poor man fought through the hordes. "The minister will be announcing tonight at an awards ceremony who won the contest and that person will then be presented with their prizes. Until then, however, don't mob the man! No one's finding out early including the winner whoever they may be so scoot on into the Great Hall it's time for supper!" The kids all moaned. Tension was running high and everyone wanted to know who had written the winning essay.

"I bet it was me!," "No Me," "No! I'm sure it was myself!" and so on it went all the way through dinner at which practically no one touched a bite. Finally Minerva had had all she could take. "Minister.. if you're ready.. I think something's going to internally combust amongst these students if you don't make the announcement soon."

The Minister smiled his understanding smile and nodded. He clapped his hands together twice and the Great Hall tables sped back against the walls leaving a huge amount of floor space. With another clap large risers and bleachers sprung up so that everyone would have a place to sit and a dais with a speaking podium sprung up. Everyone began to chatter. "Quiet down please students." said the headmistress and slowly the noise in the Hall died down once more. "Please give your attention to Minister Scrimgeour."

"Good evening everyone."

"Good evening Minister." replied the students obediently.

"Thank you.. now.. as you know.. the contest in collaboration with Flourish and Blotts."- at this moment a nice looking woman in emeraldish robes appeared from seemingly nowhere and the kids gasped and whispered. She was the current president of Flourish and Blotts and had, of course, been on the committee to select the winner. "Has been hosting a contest, as you all well know. Now.. your topic was a wizard who made a difference in our world. It took us some time reading over all of the 986 entries that we received but finally we have come to a decision about the winning piece. This person will be receiving a prize package from us including a wonderful writing stationary set, prize money of two hundred galleons, and...a Firebolt broomstick." The room hummed in anticipation. "Here.. in this little envelope. We have the winner of our essay contest." The Flourish and Blotts president handed the Minister the little envelope and he opened it, holding up the paper. Just as he was about to speak into his wand, which had become a microphone under the sonorous charm, he paused, "Should I string you out for a bit?"

"NOOO!!" Yelled practically everyone in the Great Hall until the voices ricocheted in peels against the walls and echoed back at them until even Moaning Myrtle came out of her toilet to see what was going on.

"And the winner of the essay contest is...Miss Lily Potter."

Lily was sitting in her seat of the bleachers some rows up with the rest of the fourth years, but it was like she'd never heard her name called or maybe she was frozen in time. Ana was sitting with her and she hugged her best friend tight. "Congratulations Lils!! I knew you'd do it Go on! Go down there!" Ana gave Lily a slight push as did most of the Gryffindor Quidditch team from her other side. It was lucky she didn't fall straight down the bleachers. A loud whistle came from across the room where Remus and Tonks were sitting in a line of chairs set up for the Hogwarts Staff across from the bleachers. To top it off Tonks, who had come into the hall with bright pink hair as usual, was now shifting colors in all the rainbow and cheering. Lily and Ana both tried to not laugh as they got a glimpse of her and Lily made her way through the throng of people, her heart light and happy as she walked up to the dais and shook the Minister's hand.

"That, Miss Potter, was excellent, excellent work. I'm uh.. assuming Sirius knew you wrote this."

Suddenly Lily's stomach practically fell out by her feet. She hadn't told Sirius about the report. Why tell him? She wouldn't win. "No.. um.. I haven't told him yet. I'll have to send him an owl tonight I erm.. wanted to er.. surprise him." She said a bit awkwardly, well she was going to surprise him! That was the truth, but the happiness of the situation and of winning was getting to her and rather quickly she forgot about having to tell Sirius before someone else did.

"What'd she write her paper about?" Called one Gryffindor girl from way up top.

The Minister signaled for quiet. "Lily's paper was about a wizard who was, I am most ashamed to admit,-" Lily tried not to make a face at the Minister.. whatever! She had the feeling he was just saving face and that he surely had been involved in the arrest and untrialed release of Sirius to Azkaban. Whoever said politics was a dirty business had got it juust about right! "-Sent to Azkaban without a trial and ended up being innocent. He spent twelve years there before breaking out in order to find the man that had framed him and also to see his god-son. He ended up evoking a full world panic. Lily wrote about how he changed the world by example, made us a better place by quietly taking a punishment that wasn't his, serving twelve years of a lifetime sentence that wasn't his, only breaking out when he had good reason, and how he made a difference not just to our world but to Lily personally as he'd been a big role model figure in her life, Mr. Sirius Black."

The hubbub of voices rose intensely. Before Minerva, the Minister, and the Flourish and Blotts president that Lily still didn't know the name of, could get all of them quiet again. Someone from the Daily Prophet was there taking pictures like crazy until Lily thought she was going to go blind. First the galleons were given to her in a velvet, scarlet sack, and then the writing set, which turned out being in a lap desk of the finest cherry wood and last but not least Scrimgeour presented her with the Firebolt broomstick. Lily happily traced her hand down its sleek ash handle and it's fine twig tail, it was perfect in every way. "Wow!... thank you..." She said softly. "I.. I dunno what to say except.. thank you sooo much!"

The minister just smiled, "Well, Lily, the essay was very very good, you earned it. Good luck at Quidditch, I've heard you play as well as your father and mother do." Lily blushed.

"Umm thanks." She said a bit awkwardly.

"Now.. this is your invitation to the Ministry dinner and ascot ball on Christmas Eve. You'll be reading your essay in front of everyone that evening. It's a black tie event and you'll need to bring a dinner date. You're of course welcome to bring any family or friends you choose, but you will in particular need a dinner date to sit with you, escort you to the stage, and be your dancing partner."

Lily nodded, taking all of it in rather hastily. "Alright." She took the invitation. It was white vellum and sprinkled with gold glitter, the words in fancy golden calligraphy inviting her to attend the Ascot ball as a guest of honor.

~*~*~*~

"I dunno Ana, I can't decide who I should ask." Lily was laying on her stomach on a couch in the Common room and Ana was sitting on the arm of the same couch with a thoughtful look on her face.

"Well, isn't there anyone you know.. that you.. like?" She asked, her own mind flitting upon her crush Ryan Cleary.

"Well.. not... enough.. to ask them to.. go to this." Lily said with a little sigh. "I want my first date to be someone who asks me.. to a real ball."

"This is a real ball." Ana said.

"I know, but like, here at Hogwarts."

Ana nodded, "Yeah. I guess I could definitely understand that. And of course with Dad working for the Ministry of course our whole family will go.. I've got a half brother that would love to go with you." Ana teased.

"Very funny, I'd rather eat a worm."

"Ew!" Both girls giggled happily. After all, their classes were done until the second term and it was nearly Christmas.

"Plus.. it's black tie.. I don't even know what that means."

"Formal." explained Ana instantly. "Like you've got to buy a fancy dress and your escort has to wear dress robes and stuff." Ana said, twining a silver piece of fringe in the bottom of her scarf.

Lily nodded, "Now I just have to find a dress.. are you going to come shopping then? I'm sure I can convince Tonks and Hermione to come along with us and maybe even Mum if she can get some time off from the Ministry for shopping too."

"You're serious?!" Ana asked, sitting up even straighter.

Lily nodded, her emerald eyes glowing with delight.

"In that case, I would be most honoured to come Christmas dress shopping with you." The girls folded each other into a sweet hug.

"Wait! Wait! I got it!" Exclaimed Lily breaking away. "I'll ask Sirius! to be my escort!! Who else?!"

"Lils..." Ana paused, "Look I don't want to sound like a wet blanket, but you haven't even told him he was the subject of your report, you just said that you won. You might want to prepare him for that before you ask him." She said softly.

Lily nodded, "I will... somehow."

It was only a couple of days before the dinner that Lily finally screwed up all the Gryffindor courage she possessed and decided to ask Sirius to attend with her. She was already staying with Him, Remus, Tonks, and her parents at Grimmauld place and had been for about three days thus far because of Christmas Holidays, but so far she hadn't been able to come up with the courage to ask him, and now she knew that she had to.

Lily wandered her way into the parlor where Remus and Sirius were teasing each other about something or other and sat down on the couch between the two of them. Each of her favorite men had a cup of tea and were laughing softly. She could only imagine what a relief it had been for them to be reunited and how amazing it had felt.

"Hey Sirius..." she broached, and took a quick glance over at Remus for assurance. She'd told him that she was nervous about asking Sirius to go as her escort, but it only made sense.. the paper was ABOUT him.

"Hm?" He asked, gazing intently at her over the top of the mug.

"Well um.. the essay contest?"

"What about it?"

"Well, you know how it has this ascot ball thingy. Well um.. I need an official escort and um.. I was wondering if you'd do me the honor of going with me."

Sirius froze, and slowly turned his face to look at Lily. He hadn't expected this one coming. Nor did he want too. He wasn't sure if he could sit through an ascot dinner with many of the same officials that sent him off to Azkaban without any trial or anything. How could he sit there eating with them, socializing with them after their history. His skin was already crawling with the dreaded emotions he'd experience. Or possibly just the feeling of Molly's scrub brush in the bathtub if she found out he'd been asked she'd be trying to make him get all cleaned up, which, then again, you kinda had to for an ascot ball. There we go! Another reason not to go! "Lily... I'm.. I'm honored that you asked me.. but.. I.. I can't go with you.." He said softly.

"Oh I... wait... did you just.. say?"

"Yeah.. Um.. I can't go."

"Oh..." She said softly. "I um... alright.." Lily knew that she had to get out of there or she was going to cry. She had wanted Sirius to come with her so much. He was the subject of her paper! She had forgotten entirely how little he would want to be around Ministry of Magic Officials. Please... No he couldn't do this to her?! Could he? Yes.. he could he was... and suddenly it felt like her heart was going to break in two. She had been imagining walking down that aisle with Sirius and the way he would get to sit in the front row and how she would call him up and present him to everyone at the end and let them know he really was innocent for those of them that might not believe. Never in her dream had he paused, said no, or wavered. Sure in real life he was proud of her. He had spun her around with kisses and hugs and mutual excitement when she'd told him she won.. but.. this was not how she'd pictured his reaction to asking him. Suddenly she didn't want him to see her crying over a trivial little thing like a dinner so she turned and ran from the room.

"Wait.. Lily! Where are you going?!"

Remus, to his good grace, sat on the couch and stayed rather quiet, watching the scene play out before him in deep concern. He felt like this might be partially his fault for putting ideas into Lily's head in the first place.

"Sirius.." He said with a little sigh and getting up, going to stand with his best mate.

"No... no Moony.. please.. don't you understand? I'm honored she won this award, but I can't go with her. I can't go to this dinner with all those ministry people. I'd choke."

Remus sighed, he understood. If he was in Sirius' shoes he wasn't sure if he'd be able to go either and he couldn't make Sirius do something he wasn't sure he'd be willing to suck up and do himself. And so the next two days passed in a whirlwind at 12 Grimmauld Place getting Lily ready for the Ascot ball, and she did her best to act excited about it, but Remus- and though he tried not and, Sirius, noticed a change in her. It wasn't genuine excitement. She was pretending to be excited when honestly she was crushed. Tonks, Hermione, Ginny and Ana went shopping and Draco even gave his daughter permission to spend Christmas Eve day with Lily and her family and attend the banquet with them. This seemed to lift Lily's spirits considerably as the two stowed themselves away into Lily's bedroom and wrapped up the presents they had bought in Diagon Alley on their shopping trip to Madam Malkin's for something to wear to the Ascot ball. Lily's dress turned out being one of the most beautiful she had ever owned in all of her life. It was an off the shoulder ball gown made of velvet in a cut similar to the dress from her favorite muggle animated movie, Beauty and the Beast. Hermione had even gotten ahold of pictures of that dress somehow and had Madam Malkin style Lily's after it a bit.

~*~*~*~

Lily sat straight backed on the stool in her bedroom at Twelve Grimmauld Place as Hermione twisted her beautiful red hair into a French knot. The top layer twisted and binned with a little pearl and diamond barrette and the second layer cascaded down her back in beautiful banana curls. As she stood her emerald dress swirled around her legs.

"You look adorable my sweet god-daughter." Hermione said, hugging her and pinning Lily's beautiful white furry cape around her shoulders and handing her speech. "You're going to do amazing tonight."

Sirius absent mindedly handed Witherwings another piece of dead ferret, his favorite food. The two had been on the run from the ministry together and developed a rather close attachment. "Think I should have gone Witherwings?” He asked. The half eagle half horse creature looked at Sirius with his deep orange eyes and pressed his eagle like beak up against Sirius' shoulder as if to comfort him.

He heard the honk of a car horn because the Ministry had sent two cars to pick them up and drive them to the ball that evening.

Lily ran down the stairs holding up her dress and was helped into the first car. It would be a scrunch because it was the whole Weasley brood, Harry and Ginny, Remus and Tonks, Ron and Hermione, Minerva, and Ana. Driving to the Ministry was like being sardines in a very very tight can. They didn't go in the visitors entrance at the ministry but the worker's entrance, there was no fitting all of them into that little red telephone booth in all their frills and finery this night!

One whole floor of the ministry had been reserved just for the purpose of this banquet. There was an auditorium for the speech and Celestina Warbeck, the legend witch singer was going to put in a performance on the dance floor later that evening for they had fixed up a ballroom as well with a piano and a large dancing floor. Everything was strung with merry Christmas greenery and mistletoe.

They were the last of the guests to arrive and Lily had the feeling this might have been done on purpose since she was some sort of Guest of Honor or something. Her face flushed horrible pink which on normal conditions looked back with her hair and made it look as if it was on fire, but mixed with her beautiful velvet green emerald dress made it a million and one times worse. She tried to concentrate on something else, anything else to get that horrible blushing out of her cheeks. She was led to a place to dine between the Minister of Magic himself and the other seat next to her was empty since she hadn't brought an escort. To ward off any questions Harry quickly sat down beside his young daughter and beneath the table he took her hand and squeezed it as if to say I know how much you wanted this to work out.. it's going to be ok though I promise.

"Thanks Daddy." She murmured.

"You're welcome." He said back softly. "Do you want me to escort you into the speech later?"

She shook her head, "I'll manage." She said before beginning to eat.

Remus watched her carefully throughout the salad course of the meal that was setting itself up to be one of those two or three hour dinners where they served about ten courses and you only at a little at each one and you had to remember which silverware to you use each course and had palate cleaners like ice between the courses. Sure enough on the itinerary for the night dinner had been given a three hour time slot and it barely been fifteen minutes, Remus had never been very great with super formal situations like this. He noticed Lily didn't look very much at ease either, and suddenly... he knew what he had to do...He just needed a chance to do it. Just as the soup course began he flicked his wand beneath the table and his wine glass sprung a leak. He stood up, grabbing it, trying to keep most of the grape wine off his clothes as he carried it across the room and as everyone turned back to their soups he slipped out of the door and disappeared around the corner onto the street behind the Ministry and disapparated instantly.

A Few moments later Remus knocked expectantly on the door of Madam Malkin's shop. "Madam Malkin!?" He called, hoping desperately she'd be there.

With all luck, she was, coming to the door quickly even though she was closed. "Oh! Remus.. what can I do for you?" She asked, as she ushered him inside, giving his dress robes an appraising eye, he'd been able to buy new ones from her for the ball by saving up money, and it didn't look like he needed any repair work done on these nice new ones anytime soon!

"I need a favor, and it's urgent."

"What is it Remus?" She asked, noting how harried he seemed.

"Well you see it's Lily and this contest and Sirius..."

~*~*~*~

Remus tapped on the door of Sirius' room where he was quite sure his best mate was cuddled up in the covers of his bed sulking. He did that quite a lot when he was in one of his moods. Well, tonight Remus wasn't going to let that get into the way of what was important. "What?! Can't you tell I'm sleeping?!" Came the disagreeable voice in response to the knock.

Remus winced, Ok maybe this wasn't going to be as easy as he'd thought, oh well. He wasn't going to give up. He pushed open the door of Sirius' room and went inside with a long sigh. "Sirius Black, get yourself out of that bed right now.. Madam Malkin's waiting downstairs in the family room, you're going to a ball tonight, even if I have to drag you myself."

"Moony...." Sirius begged softly, just pleading for his friend to let this go.

"Don't Moony me! Get Up Right now Sirius!"

"But...." Sirius tried to plead again.

"Look.. you've got a little girl waiting on you.. wishing you'll come..and I'll be damned if you're going to break her heart. Don't you realize she wrote her essay about YOU?"

"What?" Sirius asked, doing his best to comprehend. "You're telling me.. she... she talked about .. I didn't know she wanted to know about... about Azkaban.. I mean.."

"Look, Mate, she wanted to write about you... you're the wizard she wrote about that made a change, and the essay's brilliant. She made me promise not to tell you until she could ask you and I've been biting back whether to make you go ahead and go these past couple of days.. Sirius.. you have got to go."

Sirius sighed.. "Er... if you... put it that way.. I suppose you're right again Remus." He sighed and rested his face in his hands for a few moments. Downstairs Sirius was subjected to a horrid regime of clean up. His hair was trimmed yet again and he was forced to scrub until the skin of his cheeks and nose was pink as if he'd been sunburnt and Madam Malkin fitted him up to a new outfit of dress robes and made the changes right then and there, kneeling on the floor with a mouthful of pins in the living room of Twelve Grimmauld Place. Finally, at long last, Sirius was ready to go to the Ascot Ball at the Ministry of Magic- not that he was exactly looking forward to it. In fact his face was set in a rather grim sort of smile, but he knew that for Lily's sake he would go and if only because she was there he would enjoy himself.

"Now come ON! we have got to hurry! I left in the middle of dinner and the speech and minutes were to be next come on I say!" exclaimed Remus handing a now dress robed Sirius his cloak and hat from the hat tree in the corner.

~*~*~*~

Lily sighed uneasily as she paced her way back and forth in front of the doors to the auditorium. Throughout dinner she had gotten more and more nervous and now she stood there waiting for her cue to enter and give her speech at that podium on the huge ministry stage in front of all of those important people and even the celebrity Celestina Warbeck. Remus' leaving in the middle of dinner hadn't helped a bit either.

She sighed and wrung her hands as she pressed her ear against the door. The Minister was still talking at this moment and it just made her more nervous to hear him talking about her like that.

Sirius felt his heart melt when he saw her pacing back and forth in front of the door as she waited for the chance to go in and read her essay.. her essay about him. Slowly he walked forward. "Are you all alone miss? You look like you could use an escort." He did her a little bow as he removed his cloak and handed it to Remus who was grinning and playing the part of the coachman- well.. had their been a coach involved at all.

"No thank you.. I'm quite al-..." Lily slowly raised her face as if unable to believe the voice she had just heard. "SIRIUS!" She shrieked in delight and ran to him wrapping her arms tight around his shoulders as he spun her around and her skirts billowed out around him and she pressed her tearful face into his dress robes, which were a beautiful white and black set. His hair fell around his face in elegant, just cut, curls and was out of his eyes so that she could see them.. sparkling.. She hugged him tight again and he hugged her back, never letting her down.

A few moments later Rufus Scrimgeour came to the door of the auditorium to let Lily know that he was ready for her. He raised an eyebrow at Sirius but was very mannerly indeed, not bringing up the past at all -much to Sirius' relief and merely walked forward to shake hands. "They're ready for you, Lily." He told her and Sirius took her arm and together they opened the doors to the auditorium and with a deep breath began their walk down the aisle amongst hundreds of eyes staring at the two of them. Lily because she was their speaker and such a small little girl, only her face showing that she was over the age of ten.. and Sirius, the infamous prisoner of Azkaban. But together they made it.

At the end of the rows of seats Lily indicated where a seat had been saved for Sirius and she stepped up onto the stage herself and walked over to the podium. To her horror Lily found that she could see only about an inch above that podium as it was for an adult sized person and not a rather petite girl like herself. She moaned very softly before picking up the good copy of her essay and stepping around the podium with it. "I'm sorry.. I believe I'm just a little short." She murmured, her cheeks flushing and this drew a bit of a laugh from the crowd which lightened the mood of things a great deal.

"You see um.. before I read this essay to you... I've got to tell you the significance." She said softly, and as she spoke her voice drew strength. "We were asked, as students of Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry to write about a wizard or witch who made a difference in our world. And of course, I'll admit.. I tend to study a lot and I wrote this whole big essay.. and I wrote it on Merlin. But when I asked my friends to read it.. they all just said that.. it was ..'good' and of course that wasn't what I was looking for.. So to make a long story short I received some advice from someone I hold in the highest of esteem and have known since I was just a baby.. I was told that I should write the essay about someone I knew.. so I started from scratch.. three days before the paper was due.. and I decided to write about this great man...who not only changed the world and turned it upside down but made quite the impact in my own life. Sirius Black." She waited for the whispers in the crowd to subside before she picked up her essay and began to read.

"Sirius Black was born to Walburga black in 1960 in his family home of Twelve Grimmauld Place in London England. He had cousins Andromeda Black Tonks, Narcissa Black Malfoy, and Bellatrix Black Lestrange as well as a little brother named Regulus. The family was seriously concerned with issues of blood purity in our world and though they all weren't death eaters Regulus was and was killed in that post. Most of the family thought Voldemort had the right idea about blood purity and that the wizarding world should only contain all magic families. Sirius didn't agree with that though. He went to Hogwarts and was sorted into Gryffindor House instead of his family's more common Slytherin and made three best friends James Potter my Grandad, Remus Lupin, and Peter Pettigrew.

They bonded quickly and soon became best mates with James and Sirius being the ringleaders of their little group. But they were all smart and it only took them a couple years to realize there was something up with Remus, he disappeared often and looked sick and worn out a lot. They came to realize that he was a werewolf. Remus was terrified they would reject him. He had received the bite when he was only a very little boy because his father offended Fenrir Grayback. But to Remus' surprise they didn't reject him. In fact they even decided to become Animagi to be with him because werewolves are only a threat to humans. So in this way Sirius changed the world.. if only the little world of a twelve year old scared that the best friends he'd made would now reject him as the world did. These were small steps towards the thing Sirius would eventually do.

He proved himself to be a loyal friend- if mischievous, a truthful person, and someone who perseveres through the worst of circumstances. He changed the world of the people around him through example. I'm sure everyone here has heard the quote "Actions speak louder than words" for Sirius this proved true. He took rejection from his family for as he grew older he disputed their blood purifying mania and eventually ran away at sixteen to live with James. Later he became secret keeper for his best friend and wife and baby son, my Dad, Harry. They were in danger from Voldemort and had gone into hiding in a muggle village, Godric's hollow. Sirius became worried about someone knowing he was the secret keeper and so he switched with Peter without telling anyone. Later he went to check on Peter and didn't find him in his own hiding place. Worried Sirius went to check on my grandparents only to find them murdered and my Dad who should have been dead still alive. Peter had been a turncoat to Lord Voldemort.

Sirius was scared of course because everyone still thought he had been the secret keeper and very hurt from losing his best friends and angry that Peter had caused it he went hunting for him. People thought they saw Sirius blast Peter to bits but that wasn't really what happened. Peter had a wand behind his back. He blasted the street to pieces and you recall I said they were all animagi? Well he turned into his rat form and raced down into the sewer. Sirius knew there was no reason to argue and he stood there laughing mostly because Peter had managed to screw them all over and ruin so very many lives including his without any of the other Marauders ever having an idea he'd been the turncoat. Sirius served 12 years in Azkaban prison for a crime that he never did commit. He was hungry all the time and once saw two men kill each other fighting over a single piece of bread. He saw the dementor's kiss issued and was forced to turn into his animagus form to keep the dementors from preying on his emotions too much at one time since he was a highly guarded prisoner. But despite it all.. he stayed in there, serving a term for a man who was free living as Ronald Weasley's rat.

Ron's my own godfather and Dad's best friend. You can guess just about how well that went over when the truth came out. Sirius saw a picture of Peter in the Daily Prophet on Ron's shoulder, he knew how he looked transformed and this was finally all Sirius could take.. he broke out.. slipping through the bars in his dog form and swimming to shore. He had to run and hide from the ministry for close to two years because he had no proof of his innocence. Peter, since found out, had run off again and only Hermione, Ron, and Dad and Remus had seen him.. who was going to believe their word over a street full of people confused on what they'd seen?

Sirius was a member of a secret club formed by Albus Dumbledore and served in both wizarding wars even when he was in danger of being caught by the ministry and had to hide as a prisoner in the house he'd been so miserable in as a child he was still fighting behind the lines. When he heard of trouble at the ministry barely a year after Voldemort came back he was one of the first to head off to the Ministry to fight the trouble. In that battle he was thought to have been killed by his own cousin, Bellatrix Lestrange by being pushed through the veil of death in the department of mysteries.

No one knows quite what happened but when I was in my second year during the spring right before my 13th birthday Sirius was found unconscious on the other side of the veil on the floor by an unspeakable... it was her first and last day of work. He was taken to St. Mungo's but it was a long time before he was back to normal. He didn't remember anything about himself or what had happened. He didn't even have his magical powers at the time. But he did recover. That was a hard time for him, he couldn't even remember how to dress himself or his name even. But still he was changing his world by showing the patience.. a lot of people would have given up .. but not Sirius.

Then of course there was me.. here was this man my whole family was so happy to see but I hadn't ever met him, I'd been told he was dead and that was just that. But he was patient with me.. and I learned to love him just because he was so loving and funny and mischievous. And I never would have thought about him being someone that changed the world until Remus suggested I write about someone close to me.. to make this a personal deal.. well.. It just kind of dawned on me all of the things he's done. He turned the world upside down when he broke out of prison even though he wasn't guilty, he accepted a sentence without a trial that wasn't his own, he taught me a thing or two about love.. and oh yeah.. he was and still is busy fighting Voldemort in his spare time.. if that's not changing the world then I sure don't know what is. Thank you."

Lily breathed a sigh of relief as she lowered her paper and before she knew it everyone was up and to her utter shock they were giving her a standing ovation! She took a deep breath and bowed softly. Moments later Sirius had joined her on the stage and she was enveloped in his strong arms smelling his particular scent.. magic, woodchips, sage and suede.. earthy but very masculine and nice. Lily always felt safe when she could smell that wonderful smell. The crowd was applauding both of them now and as she looked up into Sirius' face there were tears in his fathomless gray eyes and running down his tan cheeks. "Thank you Lily." He murmured softly.

Suddenly a rather louder voice interrupted their tender moment. "If you will all head down to the ballroom now... Celestina Warbeck will be entertaining us with some of her wonderful, if I do say so myself, singing and there'll be dancing."

"Cookies and punch too?" Sirius muttered hopefully.

Lily elbowed him gently in the side. "Behave why don't you for once in your life."

"Since when do I not behave?" He asked with a smirk.

"Since always!"

"Well.. if I can't have something to eat will you at least do me the honor of having this first opening waltz with me?" He asked, holding out his hand to her.

"I would be most honored." murmured Lily as he led her out to the dance floor and began to whirl her around like nobody's business. If there was one thing the world didn't know about Sirius Black and the rest of the Marauders.. or at least most of the world, it was that they had all been good with the ladies and real charmers... even though Sirius seemingly had been the most so.

"You haven't lost a step you old hound." Lily teased with a wink as she rested her head on his shoulder and then he spun her around and caught her again.

"I'll take that as a compliment." He winked.

~*~*~*~

"Oh Merlin Lily... and do you remember when Scrimgeour asked me to dance.. I think he was just a little tipsy because he could barely keep his feet." Lily and Ana shrieked like two girls do when they're sitting on their beds back at home dishing about a dance.

"When's your father coming to get you?"

"He already did.... he's downstairs with Uncle Sirius just now."

"What do you think they're talking about?"

Ana shrugged, "I have no idea.. doesn't really matter does it since we get to hang around and talk." The girls giggled again.

It was nearly an hour later, past midnight when Sirius came upstairs after Draco had taken his daughter home and Lily was left alone in her own room in Grimmauld Place. Lily had changed into her pajamas, her special Christmas ones, red and green flannel nightdress with a little lace lining around the neck and in a line in a high waist and some on the cuffs as well. Her hair was tied back loosely in a thick red braid with a green velvet bow as she usually wore it to sleep and she was laying on her stomach in her bed writing in her journal. She looked up when Sirius knocked on her door and peeked in. Her father, mother, godparents, and Remus and Tonks had already all been in to say goodnight and tell her how proud they were of her, but it was this goodnight she was really looking forward to, especially tonight after everything that had happened. Sirius came and sat down on the bed and Lily crawled into his lap as she had done so many times over the past two years, resting her head on his chest and he rocked her gently. "Thank you soo much Sirius.. this night wouldn't've been the same without you... and thank you..for making a difference.. especially for me."

"Don't mention it.. I'm glad one of us had some sense.. thank Merlin Remus came after me. Thank you for letting me talk about it.. for understanding.. and for loving me as me.. no matter what."

"You're welcome Uncle Sirius." Lily murmured.

"I brought milk and cookies."

She giggled and took a cookie from the plate he'd brought and bit into it.. "Mmm.. Molly's home-made chocolate chip cookies with red and green bewitched chocolate by the taste."

"Exactly right.. I kinda convinced her to let me take some from the kitchen.. I know you must not have had much to eat tonight either being nervous and all."

"Thanks." She said again, hugging him. Together they sat on the bed eating up the cookies and drinking the two glasses of milk.

"You're welcome... Lily.. I have something for you..I want to give it to you tonight while we're on our own instead of in front of everyone else... I think it might be a bit.. er.. emotional."

Lily just nodded curiously, "What is it Remus?"

He smiled and lifted something wrapped in brown paper from behind his back. Lily grinned and took the little package from him and shook it gently, but it didn't make any noise. She wrapped happily into the paper and came up with a beautiful cherry wood case with a small gold latch on it. A Small gold name plaque was on the edge of it. It was tarnished and needed some tarnish remover to read the inscription on it, but Lily could tell the case had been beautiful at one point. "Go on.. open it." He encouraged. "I wanted to give it to you when I was telling you the story, but I didn't because it was better for a Christmas gift."

Lily gently unhooked the clasp and pushed back the case lid, the entire thing was lined in beautiful scarlet velvet lining material and whatever was inside was covered with a (very yellowed with age and moth eaten) used to be white- little lace veil.. Lily could tell what this was straight off. "And old wand case." She murmured.

"More than that." Sirius said softly as he unwrapped what was inside, a wand... he put it into her hand. "10 and a quarter inches, swishy, willow, unicorn hair.. I always said that was because she was pure of heart."

Lily looked up into Sirius' eyes in shock as she held up the wand, her heart thudding and her eyes burning dangerously.. "Grandmum's wand?" She murmured softly.

Sirius nodded, "Yes.. I rescued this along with the locket you wear now the night of the attack.. the wand I had managed to get to a safe spot before going after Peter and I left the locket with Hagrid.. of course he never gave it to your father until he was older, a strange gift he'd have thought it as a boy. but when you were born it was perfect for you of course." Sirius explained softly.

"Oh Sirius.." Lily murmured breathlessly and carefully laid the wand down like it was made of glass and hugged him tight. "Thank you!"

"You're welcome." He murmured softly, hugging her back. "Now give it a wave.. it won't be as close as yours since the wand chooses the witch or wizard, but you're so much more like her than you know.. I bet it'll be close."

"You think? Well... here goes nothing." Gently she swished the wand through the air and golden sparks spit from its tip bathing her a little golden type glow.

Sirius watched on wide eyed, "Wow.. what'd I tell you.. very close."

"Merlin, Sirius.. I don’t' think I can ever thank you enough for this.. I'll treasure this forever.." And she noticed Sirius' eyes were mysteriously misty.

"You'd better get into bed or Father Christmas will never come.. I think I just heard sleigh bells."

Lily laughed and nodded and crawled in beneath her sheets as she allowed Sirius to tuck her in snug as a bug in a rug and then he kissed her cheek and turned out the lights with a flick of his wand so only her little nightlight of a golden snitch glowed faintly in the darkened room as a crescent moon slit the black sky and spread light across the hardwood floor of the room as well. It really was a beautiful night. Lily sat up, then wandered over to the window where she had her telescope and focused it as she hunted. "Come and look Sirius... it's your star." She pointed to his name star and let him look.

Sirius grinned as he looked . "So it is.. and I'm guessing you're not going to be sleeping much tonight either are you?"

Lily shook her head, wayy too much dance euphoria. "You realize it's after midnight don't you? Happy Christmas Sirius."

"Happy Christmas my darling Lily." He replied as they had another hug.

Suddenly she got an idea, one that was sure to get them into trouble together as usual, "Hey Sirius... you want to sneak downstairs and open presents? There was a HUGE mound of them under the tree when Ana and I went to count them earlier tonight."

"Now what kind of question is that for a Marauder? COME ON!"